Sad Sack

Sad Sack
I am Sad Sack

Vote for my powers...

Not that I give a crap about your opinion, but in each of my posts you can vote for which "super" powers you think I used best (because your approval means so goddamned much to me).

Evil Eye/ Wall of Impenetrable Despair/Really Awkward /Stinkybutt/ Tedium

Merry Xmas and Happy Holidays!


Hey all, family and friendlies, happy holidays to you! I hope you're all gathered around with the people who annoy you the least. Singing carols, hopped up on nog and (not) chasing each other around the house with loaded firearms.

Minutes of Entertainment

Though I haven't actually seen The Princess Bride in a long time (why don't I own that?), I recently reread the book. If you haven't had a chance to read William Goldman's book, I definitely recommend it. It's funny in the way Good Omens or any Christopher Moore novel is, if you're my mom, it's not for you, but if you're anyone else, you'd probably find it hilarious and charming.

So, on a PB binge, I searched the youtube for viddies and found this slice of awesomeness:

I did surprisingly well on it, but the book seemed to hurt as much as it helped. Inigo's age when he challenged Rugen is slightly different (for no apparent reason, why would they change that for the movie?)...and the Miracle Max's idea of the best thing next to True Love was totally different (in the book, it was cough drops, of course). But lots of fun will be had by anyone who fancies themselves a PB fan.

One more thing...related videos lead me to this (can you say awesome?):

The Day of the Basset Hounds

I saw three basset hounds today. Three! And they were all random, unrelated instances of houndage. I don't think I've ever even seen one before today. How does that happen? Mom was with me at the last sighting and that was her second one of the day! She saw them, too! What's up with that? Does it mean anything? Is this one of the signs the world's ending?


On an unrelated note, finals are over. I'm relieved, I guess. But lately I'm more apprehensive about my need for a job and what that would mean for my studies, my hobbies and my overall enjoyment of life.

The logical part of me realizes that I've been lucky to have as much time off as I've had. Most people probably wouldn't have the luxury. But the selfish part of me sees the seven years I spent hoarding all my spare cash like acorns for winter. I rarely went out, had any fun, bought new clothes or cut my hair...all so I could piss it away in a year and a half. It's hard to see it go.

I need a job and soon.

Oh...but I don't want one.

But I really, really need one.


Comcastic must be a Synonym for Sucks Monkey Balls

Okay, just a short post while I have a brief moment of internet connection. Like a coma patient experiencing five short minutes of consciousness before slipping away again...My internet has been really sketchy since early October and the last week has been terrible.

It's finals week and every waking hour (give or take 3 to 5 hours of quality tv watching time - for the sake of sanity, of course) has been dedicated to studying math and painting the mural and painting my other final project slash xmas gift for mom. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'm busy.

That is all.

Intimacy without having to be in contact...

Man, I am ridiculously tired right now. No reason for it, just a sack of lazy bones. OJ mentioned that he'd be using his blog (should he ever write a blog, ahem) mostly to just update everyone on what he's currently reading and listening to. Which is a cool idea. I'm really not listening to anything in particular...still on my classic rock kick (Boston + Bad Company + Foreigner = Awesome) and book wise I've just kind of rediscovered Lynda Barry. I found a couple of her books in the mass of my old crap I pulled from mom's warehouse. **Swoons, and then says in the dreamy voice of a 14-year-old** Oh my god, it's like she was writing my life! Heh, well, all the insecurity without the boyfriends. They're in a comic strip format and they're surprisingly poignant. Turns out she sporadically travels around teaching two day writing seminars that look like a lot of fun. Next one's in Chicago in January. I wonder if mom would be up for a leetle trippy?

Ooh, Arianna Huffington is giving blogging advice to Jon Stewart right now. She says to write the first thing that comes to I'm on the right track!

Big math test today. It took us about 1 and 1/2 hours to complete it. I'm a little sketchy on probabilities, i.e. combinations and permutations (which is a shame because you can take that shit to Vegas). So I got two wrong out of 19. The fucked up thing is that all her tests are set up in such a way that if you miss more than 1 problem, you already have a B (17/19 = 0.894% motherfucker!). I'm bitter, can you tell?

Next blog: I may talk about my favorite cheese (Hint: It's spreadable)!

First Blog

And hopefully not the last. But you know how these things go. This is a family experiment, per OJ's idea that the five of us cousins each keep a blog. A way of keeping tabs on each other.

Here are my statistics, as of right now:

I'm 29.
I'm single.
I'm unemployed.
I'm at least 50 pounds overweight.

I'm an optimist.

I'm working on a mural at school right now with two other artists. It's a reproduction of a student's interpretation of Picasso's Guernica. You'd think that wouldn't entail much creativity and you'd be mostly wrong. The other two have taken the template and run away with it, which is great. I've been trying to make the pieces I'm working on as close to the (student's) original as possible. Hopefully, it's become a sort of framework for the rest of the painting. We'll see. It's monochromatic, all reds and kind of jarring. I can't wait to see it on the wall. Okay, I can wait. I don't really give a fuck. But it's been pretty entertaining and kind of fun. We (team mural) had an argument of sorts today. We have to trim off four inches from the mural to accommodate a fire alarm and the dissonance centered around which four inches to cut off. It was two of us against one...but I eventually backed off when I realized that A) I didn't really give a fuck and B) If so and so didn't get his way he would be fucking impossible. The fight kind of went out of me after that point.

I worked on that for about seven hours and then after that I really wanted a sandwich. So, after weighing my choices, I opted for the counter at Raley's supermarket. When I got there, it was closed. Those motherfuckers. It was 8:30 or something. I wandered around aimlessly, like some kind of lost, fat, paint-covered (in varying shades of blood-like red) crazy person. Finally, I decided to make my own damn sandwich...and after more aimless wandering and clueless avocado squeezing (what exactly am I looking for?), I bought all the ingredients for a delectable veggie sandwich.

And for the bargain price of only $10.69!